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yorukamome
yorukamome
..:.:::.::

June 2016
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yorukamome [userpic]
"beach haiku" ・「海辺俳句」

I've been very silent, I know - well, I'm going to have lots to post and say (hopefully, new works as well) and autumn is
probably the rightest time to...for now, here you are some 「海辺俳句」, "beach haiku": the first one, after the kindest
gift of an excellent green tea coming from the hands of the even more excellent sakuo sensei:


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唇や
月夜に甘き
とものお茶

「kuchibiru ya ・ tsukiyo ni amaki ・ tomo no o cha」
my friend’s tea, sweet to my mouth under this moonlight 


as for the other ones, well...I don't know exactly the reason for I wrote them in such a mood - maybe the simple summer ending, maybe
my new way of life begins to show its effects on my mind and soul - who can say?, I myself am still mumbleing about!...anyway, voilà:


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夏の午後
盗んだ愛の
考えは

「natsu no gogo ・ nusunda ai no ・ kangae wa」
summer afternoon - a thought of stolen love


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恋の夢
一つが終わる
夏夜毎

「koi no yume ・ hitotsu ga owaru ・ natsu yogoto」
every summer night, a dream of love gets to its end.


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夏の夜の
最後の光
磯匂う

「natsu yoru no ・ saigo no hikari ・ iso niou」
...a summer night’s salt-scented last light...


夏光
笑いの時に
年を取って

「natsu hikari ・ warai no toki ni ・ toshi o totte」
summer light, gets older in the time of a smile.


obviously (as usual) my nihongo needed billions corrections and re-writings, so thanks once again to sakuo sensei for his sudden
and extremely kind help...anyway, this is how I felt to express myself and my world along these strange, lazy, thoughtful summer
days - this time, more than ever, your comments are absolutely, needingly, deepfriendly welcome.

Comments

That second photo is one of the prettiest I've seen in quite some time...

kindest of you, dear 夢様...the photo you like is our whole coast
on its west side, with Li Galli ("syrens' islands") along it and
Capri island NOT SO FAR on the horizon...
(;-D

And for the haiku, I liked

natsu yoru no
saigo no hikari
shio nioi

best of all.

yes, I too liked lots the odd but totally real
mood felt because of such a salty tasting light!

i tuoi haiku sono uno piu bello dell'altro...davvero...pazzesco...

troppo buona, fifinette...li scriverò, anche, ma l'estate
spesso non lascia tempo all' "ARTE"...troppo mare, ne!
(:-D

bellissimi haiku...

mi ripeto, andy...mi sono lasciato andare troppo alla "VACANZA"...vedrò
di presentare adeguate giustificazioni in un prossimo futuro!
(;-P

It was well worth the wait.
Great photos and elegant haiku. I particularly like the simplicity of 'summer afternoon - a thought of stolen love'.
That feeling is so common but rarely expressed.
What a nice way for me to start my Sunday, reading all these haiku from yourself, Andrea and Lera. There must be something in the Italian air this weekend!
;)

you only allow me to say THANKS, THANKS...I've been often (although not lately)
visiting your pages, but you don't seem to post so often: I'm sure, as it was
before, that I too would have to express absolutely similar compliments, because
of absolutely similar reasons - and, it is nice for me as well to come online and
be told "you made my day better"...: THANK YOU!

a little remake

Kamome san, thank you for nice haiku that are very excellent.
If you talk care a little more, they would become more better.
Please take care , my remaking are very small.

Your original
唇を
月夜で甘し
とものお茶

「kuchibiru o ・tsukiyo de amashi ・tomo no o cha」
my friend’s tea, sweet to my mouth under this moonlight

sakuo remake
唇や
月夜に甘き
とものお茶

「kuchibiru ya ・tsukiyo ni amaki・tomo no o cha」


Your original
恋の夢
一つが終わり
夏夜毎

「koi no yume ・hitotsu ga owari ・natsu yogoto」
every summer night, a dream of love gets to its end.

sakuo remake
一つが終わる「hitotu ga owaru」

Your original
夏夜の
最後の光
塩臭い

「natsu yoru no ・saigo no hikari ・shi-o nioi」
summer night’s salt-scented last light …

sakuo remake
夏の夜の
最後の光

磯匂う

「natsu yoru no ・saigo no hikari /・/iso niou」

Sincerely yours,
sakuo.


Re: a little remake

very many thanks, sakuo sensei: I took myself the permission of modifying
my post (I changed my originals to your corrected versions) and publicly
adding my deep thanks...your teachings are always an illuminating and
"illuminated" way to learn more and more.

夜かもめ・「鴎庵」

(no subject) - (Anonymous)

nice quote-of-the-memory, dearest claudia!...and yes,
I too found that photo SENSUAL in some strange way,
with that immobile rythm of thoughts "spelled" by
the theory of gulls ...nice lines you added above!

absolutely beautiful photography and creatures of the air. i love each haiku. the "friends' tea" is a nice one :)

i'm still in Newton, Iowa with my folks. mom is improving each day. i'm driving back to Kentucky tomorrow (Monday) - an 8.5 hr. drive.

miss you and will talk with you more after i get home :)

hugs

huggy hugs to you and your Ma', bette dear, I wish her a complete
recovery!...I'm not feeling any well these last two days: I'm a
low-blood pressured since ever, but lately the thing is growing
worser, and being back to work (with my about 120 kms drive each
day up 'n down to reach there) is sure NOT helping...you know,
since my moving here, my living alone increases my already bad
"depressed mood", and every even minimal "health move" is a total
concern...but this is not the place to speak about that: hope to
read you the soonest - have a nice drive back home!

Gabbi...VERY nice

The second image is striking! Absoutely spectacular! Well, well, nice to read you once again, Gabbi.

once again
somber summer sonnets
he sings

Re: Gabbi...VERY nice

ciao, wic...UGH, tonight it's not a nice moment, as you can read above
in my reply to bette - I'm sincerely scared, at present, although I know
well I'm a serious "MALADE IMAGINAIRE"...but age carries such things and
reactions, NE? nice anyway to read you too, it was time to be back to LJ!

Bellissimo

вот и ещё
на два солнечных дня
прибавилось в копилке жизни

что бы передать чувства которыми ваши фотографии наполнили меня.
What feelings to deliver with which your photos have filled me.
я попросил сделать перевод
I have asked the la_tisana to make translation:

ecco ancora
due radiose giornate in piu
nel salvadanaio della vita


Re: Bellissimo

вы для такого комплимента: Я удостоин.
огорченно для моего плохого русского,
я использованием online переводчика.
ваше стихотворение великолепно.
спасибо за навещать я. будьте всегда
гостеприимсвом, и спасибо la_tisana.

čajka.